Leah Messer delves into her struggle with a pain medication addiction in a new interview

Leah Messer got sober after an addiction to pain killers following the birth of her youngest daughter.

Now Teen Mom 2 star has told People that she is much happier that she has overcome her troubled past as she touches on her struggle.

‘People don’t have to feel ashamed, they don’t have to feel alone in their battle with addiction,’ the reality TV star told the publication. ‘The first step really is to own it and accept it. Want better for your life, want better for your community. It takes opening up and being raw, being vulnerable and allowing others to see who you truly are to begin to heal.’

Although coming clean about personal struggles can be difficult, Leah said speaking about her history of addiction has been ‘a cathartic experience.’

‘I just feel great,’ she added. 

As she revealed on her podcast and in her memoir Hope, Grace & Faith, which was released in May, the Teen Mom star first developed an addiction to pain medication following the birth of her daughter Adalynn, seven, whom she shares with her ex-husband Jeremy Calvert.

‘I felt kind of [like a] zombie. I don’t really even remember some of those times. I don’t remember anyone carrying me to bed. I don’t remember falling asleep with my legs crisscrossed,’ she says. ‘I thought I was making it. I was barely surviving,’ she said.

Soon, the façade of back pain that disguised her addiction slipped, and she began buying pills from dealers on the street to prevent withdrawal symptoms.

In her book, Leah revealed that the addiction and her mounting depression culminated in suicidal thoughts, and she considered driving her car off a cliff in West Virginia.

Luckily, the encouragement from her Teen Mom 2 producer led her to a one-month treatment program.

The reality star revealed in her new interview that she kept her addiction secret for so long because she feared it would be used against her in her custody hearing with her ex-husband Corey Simms over their twin daughters Aleeah and Aliannah, both 10.

‘The struggle with custody of my daughters and the back and forth and uncertainty around that made it extremely difficult for me to open up,’ she said.

‘I was crying inside for someone to just help me… Had I been able to be open without being punished, without being ridiculed and the stigma against it, I probably could have gotten help a lot sooner and not been afraid.’

Her stay in the rehab program taught her to take charge and stop ‘playing victim to my circumstances,’ and it also encouraged her to cut out the ‘toxic factors’ in her life.

‘I had to create boundaries, whether it’s family, friends, business,’ she said. ‘That’s when it all started and I discovered my own identity.’

Leah urged other’s in the throes of addiction to put feelings of shame aside and reach out to their family and close friends for help.

‘[People] don’t have to feel ashamed, they don’t have to feel alone in their battle with addiction,’ she said.

Her addiction struggle have made her daughters even more precious.

‘I could have lost them. I could have lost everything, my life,’ she said. ‘So I’m very open with them about addiction and drugs and the harm that it can cause to you, your family members and everyone involved.’

Leah also spoke about her struggles raising her youngest, Adalynn, who suffers from a rare form of muscular dystrophy.

The disease causes muscles to break down over time, and is far more common in boys than in girls.

Although some serious forms of the disease may decrease life expectancy, most people with MD have normal life expectancies, though they may lose the ability to walk over time.

Because of her condition, she’ll be learning from home to protect her against the novel coronavirus.

‘Ali is actually going to be doing the eLearning, because we feel that it’s going to minimize her chances of possibly being infected with COVID-19,’ she explained. ‘Her sisters, on the other hand, will be in school in person and making sure that they’re extra cautious going into school and coming home.’

She added that the uncertainty about her daughter’s prognosis actually helped her to cope with the massive uncertainties in daily life brought on by the pandemic.

‘I handle the uncertainty and the unknown quite differently because of her rare form of muscular dystrophy,’ she said. ‘We don’t ever know what to really expect from day to day. And we don’t know when it’s going to become more progressive.’

‘Some days are harder than others,’ she added. ‘But we thrive in the face of adversity, and that’s what we’ll will continue to do.’