The moment Julie Goodwin ‘fell apart’: MasterChef winner reveals the brutal reality of her mental breakdown – and how she took her life back after six weeks in a psychiatric ward
Julie Goodwin has spoken candidly about the ‘frightening’ night she suffered a mental breakdown earlier this year.
The MasterChef winner bravely told The Australian Women’s Weekly about her long battle with acute depression and anxiety, saying she completely ‘fell apart’ when life took its toll.
The 49-year-old ended up in a psychiatric ward for six weeks and told the publication that she’s thankful that husband Michael took action when he saw she desperately needed help.
The moment Julie Goodwin ‘fell apart’: MasterChef winner reveals the brutal reality of her mental breakdown – and how she took her life back after six weeks in a psychiatric ward
Julie said she tries not to think about where she would be now if Michael didn’t take action that night back in January. He drove her to Gosford hospital on the NSW Central Coast, after she had erupted into tears.
‘I think I was as close to a complete mental breakdown as you can get and still be alive,’ Julie said.
‘I never consciously thought about not being alive or not wanting to be alive. I just couldn’t figure out how to keep going.’
Heartbreaking: Julie said she tries not to think about where she would be now if husband Michael didn’t take action that night back in January. He drove her to Gosford hospital on the NSW Central Coast, after she had erupted into tears
The chef – who runs her own business and also appeared on radio last year – said the pressure and stress of it all just became too much, leaving her to feel overwhelmed.
Julie said that before she was hospitalised, she got physically sick in December because her body was ‘reacting to her mental state.’
She said she was stressed during the bushfire crisis as her parents live on the South Coast and her family all suffered a bout of gastro. She also continued working that month. But Julie was sick with gastro for weeks, couldn’t eat and developed ulcers. She also wasn’t sleeping.
Julie said she just ‘hit a wall’ on the night of her breakdown and just reached a point where she had ‘burned out’.
Too much: The chef – who runs her own business and also appeared on radio last year – said the pressure and stress of it all just became too much, leaving her to feel overwhelmed
She said her adult sons have supported her in her recovery, despite ‘feeling ashamed’ that they had to be the ones to look after her.
The media personality said she is now on medication and has turned her life around, taking care of herself with regular meditation and exercise.
She’s also changed her ‘vindictive inner monologue’ to be more positive about things.
Julie had a message for fans, saying that if they need help, there’s ‘no shame’ in reaching out to others.
Back on top: The media personality said she is now on medication and has turned her life around, taking care of herself with regular meditation and exercise (pictured on MasterChef back in 2009)
Earlier this month meanwhile, she recalled the breakdown on The Project and thanked her husband for pulling her through her darkest days.
‘What I know from like the very centre of my soul is that he is looking out for me and that his motivation is my wellbeing.’
Speaking about the depths of her despair, she said: ‘The joy was gone.’
‘I was stuck in a situation of my own creation and I couldn’t get out, I couldn’t see a way out. And it wasn’t that I didn’t want to be alive anymore, but I couldn’t figure out how to be alive.
‘I just had voices that were despairing and dark and wrong, telling me the wrong things.’
If you or anyone you know is struggling, contact Lifeline on 13 11 14 or Beyond Blue on 1300 22 4636
Her darkest moments: ‘I just had voices that were despairing and dark and wrong, telling me the wrong things,’ Julie said